dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
