I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize