he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
