Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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