She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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