What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
