FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
