Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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