Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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