yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
