Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
