My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize