i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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