Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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