He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
