he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
