I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
false alarm. still invincible.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
