I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
There r osticjed everywhere
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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