I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
