Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
