just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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