I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
