I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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