grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
