I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
