hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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