is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
