i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
ttyl tear gas
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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