You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
