i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
