You work out of a Hotel?
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize