I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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