fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Who wears a wallet chain?!
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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