Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
