My first STD was from a foam party
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
