I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
