No, drunk sperm still make babies.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
