she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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