what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
