3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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