Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
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