Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
ok first of all what the fuck
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
