They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Can Purell be used as lube?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
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