It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
