i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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