My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Randomize
