i just wanna soil my oats bro
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
