If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
