Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
