i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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