can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize