Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize